Just for fun, open this in another tab and jam a little while you read. If you are a mobile viewer, you are totally missing out! :]

What have I been doing?
Hmm..gearing up for all the upcoming things! Right now we (Beard, his brother & I) are in PA.  The company they work for (Paradise Energy Solutions) has what they call "The Summit" once a year at their main office.  I believe it's conferences, where they discuss how they've done, and any strategies for the next year.  I decided to come along this time, we are staying at Brad's aunt and uncle's place.  Super fab hosts I tell ya :] Anyways, We arrived yesterday around lunch time and after I dropped the guys off I went up around the corner to a place called Angela's Cafe - what a COOL place! It's like a coffee shop/cafe/library/plus other things, I think I saw a music room, they have a family care center there, all kinds of stuff! I ate some lunch and spent some time on the internet and reading.  I wish we had a place like that in NY!

Hows the weather? (don't you like how I switch up the questions to be suitable for what I have subject matter for?)
Snowy! I hear they've gotten their share this year!  I'd say the roads here are a little scarier than ours. I think it's because there are a lot of back/side roads, and they probably don't get the salt and plowing that we are used to.  Plus there is like zero shoulder && people build their farms like 2 feet from the road.  (I may exaggerate a tiny bit, yes I may)

What are you doing this afternoon/evening?
Weeeell I think dear Aunt Kathy is gonna show me some cool shops for awhile (You should see her house, it has the coolest stuff!  She was telling me about an auction she goes to sometimes and what she paid for some of her items and my jaw almost hit the floor, in a good way.  I  know we are spoiled in NY with our salvation armies but sign me up for one of those auctions please!) AAAnd tonight we are going to Shady Maple with the paradise people for their 5th (I think) anniversary. I hear that I am in for quite a treat to eat/see this place (haha...eat at I mean), I'm excited about it!

What are you working on?
Nothing I think. As crazy as that sounds, since I think even in my bio it says I always have a project.  Here I go to re-write that...jk.  But really, I've had kinda a dry spell of ideas.  Or I should say, of motivation to run with ideas.  I went shopping with my Lovely mom-friend Ann last week and got a little inspired at Michaels (they have the coolest stuff right now!!) and went home to do a little re-decorating. I think with all the painting I was doing I kinda focused on that, and now that I'm between a rock and a hard place (The kitchen isn't ready to paint, and I can't seem to commit to a bedroom color) I am twiddling my thumbs.

Whats coming up?
Well next weekend our church is hosting The Gathering, which is a youth event. I'm working on a grocery list to get all the supplies to feed those kiddos. Then the focus will switch to getting my dad's house totally emptied out, and cleaned, because there is a possible renter that would like to move in.  THEN I will begin to get giddy about my trip to NC to meet all my new babies that have to get to know their Aunt Patty and LOVE HER, duh!

What is "trending" for you?
Topknots.  I've finally mastered a good one (that works for me) and It's totally my go to.  It hides crazy hair, dirty hair, any kinda hair.

now would be a good time to insert the next question:
What are you wondering now?
(haha some of these make little to no sense) I'm wondering about DIY stuff. Like, as much as that is part of my lifestyle I feel like it would be fun to include some little tips in blog posts, but i feel like nothing would be 100% original, so it would be one more tutorial out there.  And I guess I'd feel guilty like I was trying to make something that wasn't mine, MINE. BUT on the flip side, people can pick and chose which tutorials makes the most sense to them, right? I know I've typed something into pinterest or Google and weeded out the ones that didn't seem to fit my personal cognitive thinking.

So, tell me. Should I throw a little DIY in? For example, how to paint a striped wall, or an awesome topknot recipe for long hair? :)

What are you looking forward to?
A post that will be coming sometime in the short future featuring a photoshoot my talented SIL did on the perfect snowy afternoon.  I'll introduce you to a couple models that were present as well. It will be a fun time. :)

That's me in a nutshell.  These posts are fun for me because they are so scattered and from here to there, but in question form it seems to work. :)

Happy bottom half of the week, readers!

New Look


If you are reading this you have already noticed my blog's "new look".  I have been spending the last hour or so with my fabulously nerdy husband who has been helping me install this new templates and making a few tweaks here and there.

#bestvalentinesgiftever !!!!

Miss Audrey Sue has some really cool pre-made templates if you are looking for a fresh look, check her out!

Also, I learned of this new thing called BlogLovin'. Please don't call me names in your head now, I know I've heard of that before I just never actually looked into what it was. Turns out it seems like it is pure awesomeness! I haven't dug in too deep because I was focused on the blog design, but I feel like I am going to love it!  I always thought it was a little weird that there wasn't a place on Blogger where you could type in common interests and have a list of blogs come up that you might like to follow.  Enter, BlogLovin'. & then Patty...10 years later jumping on the bandwagon. As you can see to my right **picture Vanna White on Jeopardy pointing to the right in a much-too-fancy dress* I have some cool new social media buttons.  Seriously guys, excuse me as I giggle with gee.  Anywho, one of those [the heart I think] will take you to MY BlogLovin' profile.  If you are on there, follow me!

Anyways.  That was the meat of my post.  Secretly I probably just tricked you into stopping by to check me ooooout. Thanks for being a good sport. ;]

Day After

Hello lovelies! Happy belated love day to each and every one of you!! I feel like there are so many mixed feelings wrapped up in this holiday...some people love love love it, and some people despise it!  Me, I think I'm standing on neutral ground. I don't remember having bad feelings about it (except the one time I thought my supposed sweetheart in high school *coughRODcough* didn't get me anything, only to go to English class and find a big balloon and flowers on my desk :]) as a single person, nor do I think it became a huuuge bigger deal as a dater/married-er. I think it's a fun time of year to spread love to everyone, and if you do have a special someone write them a heart-felt note or exchange a small gift.  If a big Valentines she-bang fills your love cup, hop to it!  As for Beard and I, we don't go to crazy, or buy extravagant things.Today we decided to go on a "day date" and went to eat a late lunch at Chilis (probably our favorite chain restaurant) and a couple other places.  We thought of going to the mall but after we drove around the parking lot we decided it was toooo crowded.  So we came to Victor's cool Starbucks, and here we are, interneting away. Yesterday I wrote him a card because his _______________ didn't (and still hasn't!) come in the mail yet, and I woke up this morning to a very sweet note written by him.  Stuff like that melts me more than an expensive bouquet of flowers or some chocolate. His gift to me is pretty awesome I'd say (besides the well written little love note :]) .  he is going to....


.....................is the suspense killing you??

Purchase the pre-made blog template of my choice for me!! :D  I told one of my besties about that and she was like "that's such a cute nerd gift!!" But boooy this nerd's wifey is tickled pink!! I love practical gifts like that!!  the only thing that might have topped it would be a little girl boxer puppy...naah that's another story. ;]

So anyways.  I think I mentioned something before about wanting to make some changes to the home page, I really want this blog to feel like me.  I'm kinda cray cray like that...I will get something in my head and get a little obsessive about it.  Like basically that's mostly what I've been thinking about for the last week or so since I first looked into the idea.  I had been thinking about it for awhile, but I was pretty sure it was about a million dollars to do something like that. I was wrong. :] There are Toooooons of pre-made cool blog templates for sale on etsy...ranging from about $25-35! I'm sure you can get your whole page completely customized for about a million, but I'd say (for me at least) the template will be a good start.  Not too expensive, but it lets me get a little fancier than I am now.  "Oh you fancy huh?!" :]

Ok, here is where YOU come in. If you've read my 'about me', you know where I stand on "describing myself". I feel like to some extent, if you try to live life as transparent as possible, others might be able to describe you better than yourself.  Because you will probably either hype yourself up, or sell yourself short.  I suppose there are those (rude-ys) that will lie about you and make you out to be a bad person, even if you aren't.  And I suppose there are those (praise-ys) who will paint you to be a waaay cooler person than you are.  But there are also those (awesome-ys) who would tell the truth about you and your characters.  They will touch on the areas you excel in and focus on those. They will not say you cannot do things that you can't, neither will they dwell on your weaker points.

  Okaaay...this is getting way deeper than it needs to be.  so back to YOU. I am having a terrible time deciding on a blog template because I'm, well, indecisive in SERIOUS PERMANENT SITUATIONS LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!!!! ha.  No joke, that's how it feels to me.  Imagine me picking a baby name, or new car or something like that?? sheewy. It get's bad. ;] So I thought I would put a couple different ones I like up here...and get some feedback from ya'll! Ultimately I will make the decision (of course) cause it's my blog (duh) but I think it'll fun to see which one ya'll think screams Paaattttttttttttyyyy louder. :)  So feedback please fraans! Thankss! Now go score yourself some half off valentines day candy! XO

lovely #1

lovely #2

lovely #3

lovely #4

lovely #5

lovely #6

lovely #7

lovely #8

Ps. Your welcome for spending 384959393 hours narrowing it down to 8 choices. ;]

Food for thought

Don't get too excited about this, its more about food than thought I think.  The dreaded day has come.  The day that I need to go grocery shopping.  *dun dun duuuuuunnnn* For some reason that is just not my favorite task in the world.  I don't even have a good reason for dis-liking it, I don't think i'm scarred by my mom leaving me at the grocery store or anything as a child. I think it's just making the (accurate) list, the going to however many stores to get the things on the list, and then unpacking it at home.  I was spoiled at the old house because there was a h-u-g-e pantry, so I didn't have to be as careful with my list and "oopsie I already had one of those" ordeals was not so bad.  Now, I have to be very conscious of what I've got, cause I have such limited space! Anyways. I was doing this hot mama's hair last week (LOVE how it came out btdubs. excuse me as I toot my own horn.)and we were talking about grocery shopping.  I was thinking about how people's lists probably vary so much.  Like their "must haves" in the fridge.  So I thought it'd be fun to compare alittle.  Lets pretend we are "fridge swapping" for a day...pantries too. You would be pretty garenteed to find:

- coffee creamer
- celery, green peppers, onions & banana peppers (these make everything awesomer than it was to begin with!)
- condiments.  (so interesting to think that some people wouldn't have 5 dressing choices, 2 types of mustard, soy sauce, hot sauce, lemon juice, bbq sauce, the whole nine taking over their fridge doors. hmm.)
- sweet bologna
- salsa

My pantry usually always has

- granola bars
- tortilla chips
- canned chicken
- crackers
- nesquik
- cream of chicken/mushroom soup

you most likely WONT find

- spaghetti noodles
- mushrooms
- hamburger rolls (at least when we need them)
- ricotta cheese (see parenthesis above)
- soda

Boring post? Maybe. But it was something that was swirling around in my head. :)  Wonder what I'd find in your fridge....

Here I go to the grocery store.  If you see me, give me a giant hug and tell me it's almost over.  


It's another episode of What You Been Doing Wednesday!

What have I been doing?
Taking it easy, reading, enjoying a quiet day with (lots of) snow falling outside.  My dad and I shoveled about half the driveway, and boy it was harder than I expected!

What have I been reading?
I just finished Trust or Control, and am almost done with Cold Tangerines. Both good reads, in my opinion. I'm anxious to start the second of this series, but I'm waiting patiently to borrow it from some friends. Throw in a Real Simple (thanks Alicia!) and Country Living (thanks Mom!) here and there, and that's been me! #birthdaymagazinesubscriptions

What's on my mind?
My blog, surprise surprise.  I've been searching different things today about having someone design a home page for me, I'm sure you can spend as much or (hopefully) as little as you want on something like this, but I want to see whats out there.  So hopefully there will be some front street changes for this little space soon(?)!

What's for dinner?
Cheesy broccoli soup. It was that or Chicken Fajitas which I had all but decided on, but Alas...I have no peppers.  sad face.

What's coming up?
Valentines day! That holiday sneaks up on me sometimes.  What to get Beard, what to get Beard....

What am I thankful for?
YOU.  I have received comments, texts, messages, you name it about Golly's post. I'm blessed to have such a number of people who care about me and rejoice when I rejoice and grieve when I grieve.  Thank you very much!! (not lightening the mood, but I said that in my Elvis voice in case you wanted to know)

What am I suppose to be doing?
Starting dinner.  Betta go!

Oh Golly

Let me tell you about Golly.  This was baby #2 for us.  We found out I was pregnant early, about 4 weeks, in at the beginning of Nov.  This time when I took the test I decided that Beard was definitely going to view the results first. The smile that was plastered on his face when he came out of the bathroom was not one that could be faked, so I knew our hopes and prayers were answered...again! It had only been 2 months since I miscarried the first time, so I was just so tickled that we conceived again so quickly. God blessed us with new life so soon after such heartache, and I was beyond thankful.  My mom was up visiting and being able to tell her in person was a special treat for both of us.  Finding out the news kinda put a stop to the work I had been doing on our newly purchased house, but with the help of our parents and lots of dear friends, the place was still getting whipped into shape. Again, the timing just seemed so great.  We had our new house, and we would have 9 months to get settled in and ready for Golly.  < I will insert here that i was just so so hungry, seemingly all the time.  I told someone that I think I was growing another Goliath, aka Golly. :] > We didn't share our news as quickly this time, mostly because we found out so soon. I felt like I was just bursting with the news for those few weeks, and we were planning to take an announcement picture to send out with Christmas cards.  Seemed like such fun time of year to share the news! Thanksgiving rolled around. We were in Iowa visiting Brad's Aunt and Uncle and their family.  It was a much anticipated trip that was guaranteed to be a load of fun! I felt fine Thanksgiving day, but when I showered that morning I noticed some spotting.  To say that my heart dropped to the floor in an understatement.  And that's how it began. The beginning of the end for little Golly. No place/situation is ideal for a miscarriage, but lets just say that's not what I was planning for the trip.  And Thanksgiving day.  Did I still have things to be thankful for? Yes.  Was it hard to keep focused on them instead of what was happening? Heck yes.  The grief was always there, but it didn't play out physically as it did for me with baby #1. I'm guessing it's because I really tried to still engage with people there and not just put a total damper on the trip.  When we got home I think I thought it would hit right away, but again it didn't.  I NEVER like to completely lose hope until I'm sure it was a miscarriage, so I think I held on to that tiny fact.  About a week later, I knew for sure.  That was emotional of course, but still.  It sorta worried me that I wasn't down and out for days like the first time.  This was/is NOT something I want to get used to, and "take into stride" . But as time passes, I know its not.  If I'm honest, there are two tiny aches that I feel in my heart daily.  I know I am not without children and that I will see my babies in Heaven one day, but does that quench the desire to feel them grow and kick inside of me, to go through labor pains to deliver them, and to hold them in my arms and just breath them in?


"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. "
 Jeremiah 29:11

I know that God is not working against us on this.  We can't see the bigger picture like He can.  All He asks of us is to keep faith, be patient, and cling to him.  Thank goodness we have promises like the one above to hold on to on dark days.  I have a strong belief that we will have biological children someday. Until then I can only do my part and keep praying, stay healthy, and trust that he has the perfect timeline mapped out for us. I have two angels up above looking down on their mommy and daddy every day, and for that little fact, I am thankful.  

I know heartache has hit very close to home for a lot of us in the last few months.  I lost two cousins before Christmas, one to Lou Gehrig's Disease and one to a terrible farm accident.  A coworker of 4 years had two of her siblings hit by a car when they were biking home.  The list could go on.  These are tough times for all of us. I'm sure you have similar situations that come to mind as you read this.  There are many  many people grieving.  I think of my own grief for two small babies that I have never met or held a conversation with, and I try to imagine a father's or husband's or wife's grief losing their loved one with whom they have shared many memories and conversations with. We can all be there for each other, but God can actually feel the grief that we feel.  He is so so huge, and all knowing, we can go to Him with ANYTHING.  This is not the time to pull away from Him and hole up in our own little world.  We need Him to get through it, to survive. And we need each other.  It's not always about having a story to tell to "relate" to someone in their time of need, its just giving some time to be there for them. Praying for them from afar.  Letting them know that you are thinking of them.  Letting God's Agape love flow through us and translate to them. I know I have needed it before, and I can only hope that I allow myself to be a vessel to someone else who needs it. 

These posts ( first one here) are hard for me to write.  By nature I am a more upbeat, make you laugh type of person.  So to dig deep into my soul and stir up the feelings that I don't always wanna feel enough to translate into words takes awhile for me.  But they need to be spoken, and remembered. So here they are.

I am thankful for my husband, and how he gets me.  God blessed me with a good man, and I will end a difficult post with a pleasant thought.  Today marks 1.5 years of marriage, and we are just getting started. :)